October 9, 2009

SAM SHARPE

You can reach me by railway, you can reach me by trailway

You can reach me on an airplane, you can reach me with your mind

You can reach me by caravan, cross the desert like an Arab man

I don`t care how you get here, just get here if you can.

‘Get Here’ written by Brenda Russell, popularized by Oleta Adams

Some 250 years after the Battle of the Plains of Abraham and the eventual ceding of American colonies from France to England and some 140 odd years after the British North America Acts formally led to the creation of the nation now known as Canada, one of Her Royal Majesty’s sweetest subjects has retraced the steps of John Cabot, Henry Hudson and Sir Alexander Mackenzie with the most noble goal of discovering new…cock.

Yes my friends, it’s true. If not for the pursuit of cock, I, Sam Sharpe (aka The F’in Man) would never have been exposed to the wisdom, humour and general good spirit of my comrade in charms, the one and only Elisabeth Rose.

As a typical man with the typical male obsession with my own junk, it is comforting and affirming to know that the all conquering power of the penis (and not just imperial greed) can be the catalyst for cross Atlantic travel. If you don’t believe that what I’m saying is true check out Elisabeth Rose’s New City, New… To hear her tell it, it would seem that our fair English rose needed a change of scenery in order to improve her chances of winning the penis jackpot. (Hmm… just what would that kind of lottery be called? A ‘cockpot’? Hitting the ‘powerball’? Or a hard six and easy eight – you know, like in a dice game)?

But in all seriousness folks, this begs the question: how far would you go in the pursuit of new cock (or for the fellas reading this, how far would you travel for fresh p****)? To be clear I’m not talking love people. I know we’d all move mountains for the one we love.  So please tell me how far would you be willing to travel for the one you just love to fuck?

Let me know.

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