November 2, 2009
Gather round y’all, because Skye has got a story for you.
Now the heroine of my story is my friend Saffron, a real looker by anyone’s standards, who oozes sexuality – even when she’s doing something as mundane as cleaning a toilet. Due to her natural ‘talents’ men tend to notice her, and by notice I mean work real hard to get close to her.
Colin, was one such man, and he first noticed Saffron while she was hard at work in a clothing store. Although he did his best to downplay his interest, Saffron (who at 16 was already used to guys running a full court press to get to her) quickly drew his card.
‘I think I should probably tell you that I’m only 16 – sir,’ she said, flashing him her Colgate smile. ‘Because I think you’re probably too old for me.’
Colin (who was pushing 25 at the time) started stammering. ‘Uh…uhm…I thought you wer-’ He nervously fingered the dress shirt she’d been showing him. ‘I’ll take this one in a size 16.’
‘I’m sure you will.’ Saffron placed the shirt in his hand, and watched him move, at a feverish clip, towards the cashier – away from her.
But that was not the last time they would meet. Saffron and Colin ran into each other time and time again – at the bank, the local YMCA, the grocery store, the mall, and even the library. They bumped into each other so often that they fell into the habit of stopping to chat for a few minutes whenever they met. Over the years they became friends and despite herself Saffron started to develop feelings for Colin.
How could she help falling for the man who’d spent years waiting to be with her? Colin had watched her grow from a girl to a woman and dealt with her giving him a whole of attitude on more than one occasion. Even with all of that, he was still here, waiting patiently for her to notice him. Well, one day about 10 years after their first meeting, Saffron finally let him know how she felt.
When she told Colin she wanted to date him, he was flabbergasted. When he got over his shock he asked her to go out that very night. They went out together the next four nights, and enjoyed being with each other so much that they both knew they’d be hitting the sheets on their next date.
On the night of their hookup, Saffron agreed to meet him at his place. After eating dinner together, they made their way to his bedroom. Now, my girl Saffron was good to go and based on the way he’d been looking at her over dinner, she was sure Colin was too. They’d both been waiting a long time for this moment, so she couldn’t understand why he was moving so slowly. After more than 30 minutes of some intense groping, she was buck naked and waiting for him to shuck his pants – which he seemed determined to keep on. Whenever she reached for his fly, he gently guided her hand away from his waist.
What the fuck is going on? Saffron sighed as he buried his face between her thighs again. How much of this no dick action does he think I can take?
A few minutes later (what seemed like an eternity to Saffron) Colin finally said, ‘You ready now baby?’
Damn straight. ‘Yes,’ she said, reaching for his fly once again.
‘Let me get the lights.’ Colin leaned towards the bedside lamp.
‘Why? I like looking at you,’ Saffron said.
Colin switched the lights off anyway.
Once the lights were off Colin seemed to relax and Saffron took the opportunity to unzip his fly. I finally get to see what you’re working with. She slipped her hand through the opening of his boxers and eagerly reached for his jewels. But when her small, delicate hand made contact with his junk, she had to stifle a gasp.
Oh. My. God. What’s up with his dick? Is it even hard? Saffron’s heart sank as she processed the sad truth. She could almost feel her love juices drying up. Colin’s dick was (from what she could tell without seeing it) about the size of…
Both her thumbs put together
Side by side.
That’s why he waited so long to take his pants off. Shit, what do I do now? Saffron knew she couldn’t even pretend to be excited about playing with such a tiny dick, and that she needed to get out of the situation without hurting his feelings – too much.
‘Colin,’ Saffron whispered in his ear as he kissed her neck.
‘I’m feeling a little queasy. Just let me go to the bathroom, I’ll be back in a second.’
When Colin responded his voice was almost inaudible. ‘Okay, I’ll be right here.’
Saffron got out of bed and scurried to the bathroom. Once safely behind the closed door, she moved into action. Alright girl. Focus. First, she made a production of making loud retching noises and flushing the toilet a few times. Then she splashed water on her face and pinched her cheeks hard until they were both bright red. Finally, when she was sure that she had spent at least 10 minutes in the bathroom, she took a large bath towel off the shelf mounted above the toilet and wrapped it around herself. Make this convincing Saffron.
She opened the bathroom door to find Colin sitting in bed with his pants on, as he flipped through a magazine.
‘You feeling sick, huh?’ He didn’t raise his eyes to look at her.
‘Yeah. I’m not sure what happened, but I think I should probably go home.’
‘Alright,’ he said, getting out of the bed. ‘I’ll give you some privacy.’
‘Thanks.’ Saffron felt relieved and like a complete bitch all at once.
Once he was gone, Saffron got dressed in lightening speed, found her purse and then made her way out to the living room. He was on his couch watching TV.
‘Uh…Colin, I’m ready to go.’
‘Alright,’ he said, again without turning to look at her. ‘Please just call me when you get home, okay?’
‘No problem,’ Saffron, struggled to find something positive to say, that wouldn’t imply that they’d be going out again. ‘I had a nice time tonight. Thanks for everything.’
Colin nodded, but still didn’t look at her. ‘You’re welcome. I enjoyed myself too.’
‘Okay, Bye.’ Saffron continued down the hall and out the front door. As she walked toward the elevator she knew that as much as they liked each other, the events of the night had brought their connection to an end. Saffron felt a wave of sadness hit her. Am I giving up on a great guy over something frivolous?
‘No,’ she said to herself, as the elevator doors closed. ’Two thumbs simply ain’t enough for me.’
Until next time keep your two thumbs up,