September 14, 2010

ELIZABETH ROSE

“It’s hard to understand addiction unless you have experienced it.” – Ken Hensley

Sex addiction seems to be becoming fairly trendy for chaps these days. We’ve had Hollywood stars, US Presidents, golf champions, even long haired British comics in really tight trousers. Just out of interest, how many female sex addicts have declared themselves?  Very few powerful celebrities, as it turns out. In fact, most ladies have gone public with their stories post-addiction recovery and a common trend is that they choose to become sex workers to feed their addiction.

I’m going to say something controversial. (There I go, always surprising you!) Before you second guess me and assume I am about to tell you I am a sex addict. I’m not.

I don’t believe sex can be addictive. I don’t think there is any such thing as sexual addiction or sex addicts. For a number of the cases that have gone public, I would suggest it is a PR stunt to garner sympathy with the public…

“Awww, he couldn’t help it. He’s an addict.”

Yes, that poor attractive / powerful / rich / successful / celebrity man (delete as appropriate) just couldn’t help doing what comes naturally and putting his dick in all those women.

I do agree that people can like sex, and to a dangerous level when it becomes a compulsion. (A compulsion that can also be caused by damage to the front of the brain – they even proved this in rats).

What I cannot fathom is people insinuating that this is a disease or an addiction. What are they addicted to?

1. The sensation of penetration? In which case surely masturbatory aids or even just a hole in the mattress would do.
2. The release of chemicals in the brain? Also released during exercise, eating chocolate and laughing. So surely an hour on the treadmill with a bar of Dairy Milk and Russell Brand stand up on the telly should fix it.

In the US, the National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity has defined sexual addiction as “engaging in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behaviour acted out despite increasing negative consequences to self and others.”

This sounds awfully like a compulsion to me… In fact the word “addiction” isn’t even a defined medical term (Reference: Diagnostic and Statistics Manual IV). The closest included in the reference (the go-to source for diagnostic terms) would be “dependence”.

So my opinion of the culture that is arising of excusing behaviours based on “I’m addicted” and “it’s a disease”; is that it is really just a culture of making excuses.  If science does prove me wrong* in my “take the consequences of your actions” school of thought, I will be among the first to acknowledge this (and probably register myself for sex addiction treatment). However, in the meantime let’s just call a spade a spade, a slut a slut or a cheating bastard a cheating bastard.

*I refer to “science” as the current work on dopamine effects and variable metabolism and basal ganglia pathology which may soon give us enough knowledge to start to define when “behaviour” has a true pathological base as a disease, or is merely a result of personality traits. Without this research being complete, I’m afraid all other points are largely opinions, personal agendas and PR. (My own included).

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