October 11, 2010

SAM SHARPE

“See that’s the thing about dressing to impress. All the outfits that promise the most fun when you put them on are even more fun to take off.”  - Sam Sharpe aka The F’in Man

Okay, I know quoting myself makes me appear full of it. Maybe I am. But what I do know is that I’m also often full of insight. Especially about what turns a man on. As I’ve mentioned before, it’s important to dress for the sex you want. So when trying to pick a drought breaking outfit one must consider the audience. And if that audience consists of red-blooded heterosexual men, here are a few things you need to consider:

Track pants are just that, pants for the track. Hey, walking into the living room to see my lady curled up on the sofa with her hair pulled back, book in hand, wearing a comfy t-shirt and a slinky pair of track pants that clings to all the right parts is a turn on. But that’s my lady. That’s a relationship. That’s a situation where a certain rhythm has already been created. We’re already having sex. Maybe we just finished having sex. Celibacy breakin’ this ain’t. If you’re looking to bust out of your slump wearing track pants everywhere you go isn’t going to cut it.

Less is more, more or less. So you’re going out. Trying to meet someone new. Here’s a tip: Less fabric, more skin. I’m not talking about tarting yourself up like Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian at a Super Bowl after party. But I am saying you need to display your assets. If you’ve got nice legs and an a** that won’t quit, wear a skirt. Flaunt it, show it, and give us an idea of what you’re working with. If you’re bodaciously breasted (a la Skye Blue or Elisabeth Rose) a flattering neckline is the order of the day.

Keep up with the times. Bell-bottoms. Harem Pants. Pastel colours. These things all have their place: Halloween, costume balls and MC Hammer videos. Never ever on a date. Not if you’re trying to attract a new partner. I’m not saying that you have to be a fashionista but if you don’t put the time in to look good, why should I take the time to take a good look at you?

I’d also like to save a word for the men: These rules apply to you as well. I’ve lost track of the amount of times I’ve listened to men complain about an inability to meet women and then they turn around and head to the bar trying to approach women with a beer in hand, wearing a baseball cap and Toronto Maple Leafs Jersey. Or the dudes who put on a suit two sizes two small, head out to a wedding and can’t understand why women aren’t all over them.

A large part of me doesn’t know why I’m writing this post. Don’t people know these things? Doesn’t everyone know that you catch more flies with honey? Based on what I see day to day and other anecdotal evidence clearly that’s not the case.

Share This

---

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
•