December 7, 2010

SKYE BLUE

I first heard about (WARNING: If you’re at work, before you click turn your volume down) Shirley’s Dirty Bingo in late September, when one of the staff at a shop I frequent told me about all the fun she’d had at one such event.

“A bingo night with a wise-crackin’ drag queen named Shirley, who hands out sex toys as prizes you say? Awesome.”

Within hours of first hearing about the event I was online perusing Shirley’s site and I noticed that she was one busy drag queen.  She was sharing the joy of dirty bingo with people all over Toronto – and even in Barrie. With that kind of range she had to be a supreme bingo mistress, right?

Ever the planner I contacted Shirley on FB to ask about booking and pricing, and being the consummate business woman, Shirley got back to me in minutes. I was delighted when I read that a mere 20 bones would get you 10 rounds of bingo and that there was still lots of space available on an upcoming night. Armed with all the information I needed, I started rounding up my girls.

It took a while to coordinate schedules, but when me and my peeps (that’s myself, Misty, and six of our other friends) finally made it out to our first ever dirty bingo night we had a blast. As we entered the bar, Shirley, who was absolutely exquisite in her curly ginger wig, knee length blue skirt with crinoline for extra glam and a red cowboy shirt with snazzy mother of pearl snap buttons (her signature look), welcomed us warmly. (Well, at least one of us. I think the boyfriend of one of the ladies in our party may have been the reason we got a little bit of extra attention. Within minutes of meeting Shirley you’ll realize she’s not shy about flirting.) She guided us to our table and we quickly settled in, hustling to order our food and drink, before the games began.

Once seated, I took some time to suss out the crowd. The pub was packed and virtually everybody was there to play bingo. Although I’m still not sure what I was expecting, I wasn’t ready for the very pregnant woman perched on a chair near the entrance, eagerly awaiting the start of the proceedings; the table of graying senior citizens (a group Shirley playfully referred to as the Golden Girls), who based on their raucous interaction with the host of the night were clearly regulars; or the massive table of married couples out for a night on the town, who were whooping it up at the back of the room like college kids. It was definitely an interesting mix of folk. Minutes later Shirley announced the games were about to begin, and after she ran through some basic rules for the night the first number was called.

Well, folks before my first night at dirty bingo I can’t say that I was a big fan of the game. Outside of the odd bingo game we kids were entertained with at the pop and chip parties I attended when I was in public school, I’d never really played bingo. But between Shirley’s come-ons to the cuter men in the room, her arsenal of lurid jokes and jabs at the crowd*, and the electric energy in that pub as we all vied for a chance to take home one of the choice sex toys she had on display, I became a believer – a dirty bingo convert so to speak…

My name is Skye Blue, and Shirley’s Dirty Bingo Nights are now among my favourite things.

People, I had so much fun that first night that I rounded up another group of friends and went again the very next week. And you best believe my new bff Shirley is going to see me at least one more time over the holidays.

So, if you’re looking to add some fun and spice to your holiday season, have a fun-filled girl’s night out, or just hoping to add a sex toy or two to your collection, my advice is to check out one of Shirley’s Dirty Bingo nights – soon.

Skye's Dirty Bingo Winnings

Oh. I almost forgot. The stars aligned both times I hung out with Shirley and I actually won the amazing (and very LARGE) prizes pictured here. I may get around to using the dildo one day, but I’m really not sure about that fist.

S

*FYI: People, Shirley’s Dirty Bingo nights are not for the faint of heart. She specializes in adult entertainment. So if you’re easily offended, you’d better take a pass. Just sayin’.

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