Yes, I’m a bit sex negative, not so much for judging others but for being uncomfortable with the fact that I have sexual needs but no desire to be in a relationship at the present time. There, I said it.

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I think the best place to start is where you did, Miss Blue – in looking closely at the *language* we use when we talk OR THINK about our own sexuality and desires. Do we feel the need to choose *this* term over *that* one? To make excuses? To try and validate? To leave some things out?
Once you start there, look closer at that language – what you do and don’t say.
It also helps to think outside the box. Invite in a fantasy that seems totally outside the norm …. and see where that takes you….
NikkiB recently posted..Hey Mr Trash Man! Whose life sucks now

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I don’t think I’m sex negative, I just prefer to keep my sex life private, and I don’t really want to be privy to the sex lives of most other people either. I think whatever people want to do behind closed doors between consenting adults, is fine with me, just don’t tell me about it. And hellz yeah, I’m gonna express disgust at some of the stuff other people do that I have heard about (anything involving animals or feces falls into this category) and would never do myself. Blarghhhh!
Aunt Juicebox recently posted..The Fucktards- Episode 8001- and Possibly the Finale

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I believe that our society as a whole is rather sex negative.

First, it seems from the article that you are Canadian; I’m from the U.S. so the culture with respect to sex differs slightly. Canadians are often more open sexually than here in the U.S, and tend to have more positive attitudes (or more appropriately, less-negative) toward sex. That being said, I was rather disappointed upon reading this, because although you’re better than the U.S, a negative attitude toward sex is still ever present within the culture. This disappointment is probably due to my idealization of Canada (I’m very liberal, and Canada is much more liberal than the states), but also due to my hope that because it is more liberal the attitudes are POSITIVE as opposed to merely “less negative” (I hate making these broad generalizations, but with a topic so pervasive its rather difficult to avoid).

I believe that many of the people that maintain a negative attitude toward sex never actually think as to why they have the views that they do. Certain beliefs are ingrained within a society (for example: a person should be in love to have sex, casual sex is wrong, a double standard for men and women, the “wrongness” for lack of a better word, to explore ones sexuality) and many, being raised within that society, blindly accept those views, which hinders the sexual growth, exploration, and freedom of the individual. If we ever want to live in a sex-positive society, individuals must begin to form their OWN opinions on sex , instead of just adopting whatever is laid out for them. Regardless of the opinions they form, I think they would be more open and respectful towards the attitudes of others, because sex can now be seen as a personal choice (and people are free to believe what they like), as opposed to some dogma of society where there is a strict “right” and “wrong”.

For example, in the states the church has a substantial influence on societal views (as it does in many other countries, but particularly so here when compared with other western cultures), particularly with respect to sex. The negative sexual attitude so prevalent within society is largely due to religious influence. These societal norms are followed by many, and those who deviate from them are demonized. However, when adopting the norms, one does so without much consideration as to why those norms exist. The religious views (particularly Christian) that are to a large extent responsible for the general attitude toward sex are not recognized as the source of the norms and therefore, many people, that do not follow or accept the religion, subscribe to its ideals unknowingly when maintaining certain attitudes. If the sexual norm is primarily due to the religious values of a religion that one does not follow, then why accept the views it imposes upon society? If more people actually gave some thought to it, attitudes would certainly change and develop as they explored the reasoning behind their ideals and values, and developed individual attitudes based on reason.

Hopefully, more people do begin to think about their values and the reasoning behind them, which I believe will lead to a more positive, accepting, and tolerant society. Thanks to blogs like this one, I think many are beginning to challenge their beliefs and the beliefs of society, and for that I thank you!

and sorry I wrote a damn essay haha

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