June 9, 2011

CHARLIE

There are many theories and lots of chatter around on the beginnings of pornography – I thought this week we could discuss just a few of them. Many different media and approaches have been used to capture the naked form. These days internet porn and sexting nudity is everywhere – but way back when, long before the invention of cameras – digital or otherwise – people had to be rather inventive about sharing dirty pictures…

Figurines:

Venus of Hohle Fels is a thirty five thousand year old statue which could well have been used as a masturbatory aid. Historians and serious museum going types may say this is a religious figure, but lets be honest – it’s more likely porn.

The Beautiful Servant (Pointless Resistance), by Jean Honoré Fragonard (1732-1806). Undated Oil on canvas, oval © The National Museum of Fine Arts, Stockholm. A slightly more contemporary and perhaps staid example of the type of 'porn' that predated cameras.

Wall paintings:

Caves in Germany, France and England have graphic depictions etched onto the walls. The English images being stylised vaginas, while one of the more memorable German drawings features a chap (nicknamed Adonis von Zschernitz) bending a woman over.

Hill Figures:

Perhaps a personal favourite is the Cerne Abbas giant. This 180 foot figure, which features a massive phallus, is carved into an English hillside in chalk. It’s been there since well before man went airborne, so I like to think that the local villagers marked it out to amuse aliens and gods.

Church walls:

Christianity has had its ups and downs throughout history – however, the recruitment policy they took to daub risqué pictures on the walls of churches was pretty inspired. Many old churches around Europe have what can only be characterised as very saucy illustrations laid out in mosaic or delicately painted onto the walls and ceilings. Even the statues look quite impressive considering how many demonstrations against porn or even Michelangelo’s David have been undertaken by Evangelicals or other such movements.

Whenever or wherever the first naked lady was carved, or the very first phallus was daubed onto a cave wall one thing is certain. However far back you go, there has always been porn!

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