People, today is a really special day. You wanna know why? Well, for the first time ever, Secrets From the Goody Drawer actually has some goodies in it – and not the fictional variety either.

That’s right all, we’ve got not one but two sex toys to give away. And not just your run of the mill dildo or vibe. Nope. What we here at MetAnotherFrog.com have got our hot and horny little hands on are not one, but two of the world’s most popular and eco-sexy vibes for couples. The new and very much improved…

We-Vibe 3

What is a We-Vibe 3

Now for the benefit of anyone out there who’s scratching their head saying “WTF is a We-Vibe?” allow me to tell you all a little bit about this ecstasy inducing product that more than two million people in over 50 countries are using to add a whole lot of spice to their horizontal time. (FYI: I am among those two million people and let me tell you We-Vibe are the bees knees of sex toys. Just sayin’.)

The We-Vibe 3 is an incredibly innovative, highly flexible C-shaped vibrator made of 100% body-safe medical grade silicone, and the latest edition the We-Vibe brand. Designed to be worn by women during sex, this product provides stimulation to both the G-spot and clitoris, while also leaving enough room for their bed mates get in on all the good vibes and pleasure.

As with all We-Vibe products, the newest addition to the We-Vibe family upholds the brand’s commitment to comfort, safety, and sustainability, featuring a long- lasting rechargeable battery and a charger unit that doubles as a carrying case. And the people folks behind We-Vibe were definitely thinking when they designed the carrying case. At a casual glance it is easily be mistaken for an air freshener (as per the image of mine below) , which means you can discreetly keep it at the ready, charging on your nightstand without worrying about anyone stumbling upon your goodies – BONUS!

What’s more this relatively small toy is equipped with two custom-engineered, whisper quiet motors that offer 40% more vibration power than previous models, in addition to six thrilling vibration modes to choose from. Plus, it’s completely waterproof design makes it the perfect toy for those who enjoy playtime outside the bedroom and no fuss cleanups. But best of all, every We-Vibe 3 comes with its own wireless remote control that allows couples (or self-lovin’ single gals) to conveniently select their desired vibration modes without having to kill the mood or the momentum mid diddle to adjust its settings. Talk about sharing the pleasure!

What You Need to Do to Win A We-Vibe3

So now that I’ve let you in on the joys of a We-Vibe 3 I bet you’re all asking yourselves

“How can I get my hands on one of those free We-Vibe joints?”

Well, you could head out to your local or fave web-based sex toy shop and drop the $149.00 necessary to snag your very own We-Vibe. But why do that when we’re giving two away for FREE: especially when all we’re asking to do is do what we do best. Namely over share about your sex life and/or sexual fantasies (and no, I’m not kidding!) by telling us the following on or before Friday, January 13, 2012:

How you and your bed buddy of choice plan to make use of a We-Vibe 3, when you get it in your own hot and horny hands?

Yep folks, we need you to get creative and share your own story and/or fantasy that involves you, your favourite horizontal mambo partner and a We-Vibe 3 in order to win. And since we like to be as inclusive as possible here at MetAnotherFrog.com, and we recognize that some of you out there are better talkers than writers, we’re accepting written and video submissions, with one of two We-Vibe 3’s going to the best submission (as voted on by the MetAnotherFrog.com team) in each category.

Now here are the guidelines.

1. Written submissions – prose or poetry – must have a word count of 400-1500 words.
2. Video submissions must be a maximum of three minutes long (featuring you gabbing away about how you plan to use your We-Vibe 3 – no live action demos, please and thanks.)
3. Include the author’s/producer’s name, url (as applicable) and mailing address.
4. Be submitted on or before the submission deadline of Friday January 13, 2012 to info at metanotherfrog dot com.

Alright people, we’re looking forward to seeing all your submissions as we know some of you out there are going to bring the sexy and the funny with your stories – and we can’t wait to see what you come up with.  Okay, I’m going to sign off, as that’s all I’ve got for you today.

Till Next Time,

SB

P.S. One more quick thing. Can I ask you all to do me one small favour before I go? Please help us spread the word about this contest by telling your friends, coworkers and any family members you won’t traumatize about it. Thank you.

Welcome back folks!

If you missed Part 1 of my interview with Ms. Cynthia Loyst yesterday, take a few moments to check it out. Otherwise just keep on reading to find out more about her thoughts on our society’s views on all things sex…

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Skye: What do you think are the most important factors in maintaining a good sexual relationship with your partner?

CL: I think you have to know yourself really well and have your own sense of confidence/sense of self that is not found through another person. Another person is not going to complete you or make your sex life better for you. You have to be in charge of all that stuff. Another person may add to all of that, but you have to be ready and willing to communicate.

There was great book out a couple of years ago, Mating in Captivity, by Esther Perel, and she talked about our obsession with over-talking to our partners. It can be counter to our erotic spirit to know every single detail about what your partner’s thinking. And I tend to agree with that. There is something inherent in eroticism that requires a little bit of mystery. That doesn’t mean concealing or withholding really important things that your partner should know about you, but I do think spending all your time talking about all your problems and issues with your partner isn’t a good idea. You’ve got to spread yourself around a little bit.

Trying to find all of your life’s joys from one single person is a recipe for disaster. I think you need to have other things going on in your life. To have a successful sex life, you need to create your own erotic interests. And whether that just means you have a vibrant, colourful masturbatory life, or whether that means you’ve had that conversation with your partner and you’re going to go outside of the relationship to seek it, you need to know what feeds your erotic spirit and cultivate it…In ways that are workable in your relationship for both you and your partner.

Skye: You’re on record as saying that “one of the biggest sexual taboos in our society is masturbation, particularly with respect to teaching it to young people and girls specifically.” Why do you think this relatively innocuous solo sex act causes so much consternation when it comes up?

CL: Well I still think people think of masturbation as a depraved act. Of course everybody knows that boys do it, but girls doing it is much less discussed. Also, it’s still thought of something that you do only when you’re single and desperate. There are these weird negative connotations surrounding masturbation.

I’m constantly surprised by people’s reactions. In fact, while I was at work talking to a relatively young guy and sex toys – which by extension are about masturbation – came up, and he told me he wouldn’t want his girlfriend to bring sex toys into the bedroom. For him the idea that she might use her sex toys in and please herself, or even masturbate, in front of him was unthinkable. And that type of thinking is not unheard of. Lots of men feel that way.

People are also afraid of kids learning about their bodies, because it’s this kind of slippery slope mentality: “If you teach them about condoms they’re going to be screwing on the streets”. To some people that’s the next logical step after teaching kids about condoms. Similarly, masturbation is seen as a gateway drug to sex by some people. (giggling) It’s like if you start touching yourself, who knows what you’ll be touching next. People get embarrassed when their kids start touching themselves at a young age, and they don’t want to deal with it. So the cycle of shame is perpetuated.

Of course the studies show the more you know about your body, the more it can delay having intercourse. The more empowered people can become, particularly women. Despite this, you have cases like Jocelyn Elders, who was the US Secretary General during the Clinton Administration, who was let go for suggesting that young girls should learn about masturbation in school. And I still think that would happen today in the US…and maybe even in Canada.

Skye Blue: And while we’re on the topic of self induced pleasure, in your opinion what is it about discussing anything concerning sexual pleasure that is so problematic for so many?

Regarding discussions around sexual pleasure, I think many people find it tricky to talk about because like the “slippery slope” mentality, there are those who believe if you start to indulge in sexual pleasure you’ll end up having a wild, unbridled sexuality with no clear boundaries. Kind of like a Pandora’s Box that opens up and unleashes all kinds of sexual problems.

While that idea is mostly ridiculous, the idea that there are sexual problems in the world is certainly worth discussing. This is a huge topic so I’ll try to make my thoughts as simple as possible.

I think we can all agree that virtually any expression of sexuality coming from a thoughtless, irresponsible, desperate or vulnerable place can and does cause problems. Also, whenever you have something that people fear, you’ll unfortunately find people having difficulties engaging in open, honest, and measured discussions.

Sexual pleasure is so individual that it’s a topic that leaves many people confused. What one person considers pleasurable could be an absolute turnoff for another. For example, someone who really loves BDSM may not understand or relate to someone who loves ‘vanilla’ sex. So it can be difficult to discuss or share personal ideas of pleasure if we are practically speaking another language.

And beyond that, it’s also sometimes hard to know what authentic sexual pleasure really is. For example, whenever I went on porn sets while shooting for SexTV all of the performers – particularly the female ones – would talk about how much they love sex. Whether that is actually true for them all of the time, somewhat true for them some of the time, or not exactly true but an important part of an image they are selling is something only they themselves know for sure. As a sex positive feminist, I want to support all women for the choices they make. But the question remains: just because they say their job gives them pleasure, is that truly pleasure?

Although there are many women in the sex industry (in porn, sex work, etc) who genuinely want to be there, love what they do and who are making empowered choices, there are also many there because they felt they had no other choice, or were coerced into it or have simply lost sight of their own personal desires not connected to commerce.

There are also young girls who emulate pornography tropes that they see in music videos – for example, making out with their girlfriends for the pleasure of their boyfriends, experimenting to get attention, etc – so again, it’s hard to say if that is authentic sexual pleasure or if it’s an artificial representation. And obviously these lines are often hard to separate; making the idea of pleasure even more difficult to talk about.

So…when it comes to our difficulties talking about pleasure it comes from many places. There’s our collective, societal shame and fear around sexual pleasure; our fears around sexual dangers; and our varied definitions and understandings of what authentic sexual pleasure is.

The answer to resolving these problems is paradoxically simple and complex: we need to teach better, learn better, listen better and love better.

Skye: Regarding changing our society’s attitude towards sex, you’ve been cited as stating that you would “… love to change this idea that sex is one of those subjects that people shouldn’t talk about …People should always be allowed to honestly express their ideas and thoughts about sexuality – even, perhaps especially, when their desires are on the outskirts of what is considered “normal.” We can’t understand things if we don’t hear and listen.” What do you think we as individuals can do to promote such a change? And who are some of the key players – individuals or organizations – in Canada you think are helping to move our society forward in this way?

CL:  I think people need to look inside themselves and think about their authentic desires. Indulge themselves in their fantasy life, and not be so judgmental towards people who are living differently than they are.

I’ve heard a lot of people who are extraordinarily judgmental of people who cheat. So they’ll say things like “Did you hear that so and so’s husband cheated on her? What a horrible man. Blah, blah, blah”, until they find themselves attracted to somebody else while they are in a relationship. They start having to consider questions like “Am I a cheater?”  or “Will I cheat?” and it’s then that they suddenly see just how complicated those issues are.

We also need to acknowledge that people around us have different experiences and that things are rarely binary opposites; black and white, good or bad. We like to think that they are, but that’s rarely the case.  We need to think about the nuances of sexuality.

Also, just because so and so likes to be tied up and hung upside down, and that’s not something you’d ever want to do doesn’t mean it’s not a great thing to do – as long as it’s done in a safe and consensual way. Even if you are the most vanilla person in the world, and that’s successful sex for you, I think it’s important to expand your idea of what is okay sexually.

And I think the same holds true in the reverse. The people who are out on the fringes, exploring their kinks and who have really thought a lot about their sexuality, also need to give a break to the people back on the vanilla side of things.

Your sexuality is as unique as your own fingerprint. I really think it’s insane for people to sit and compare themselves with what their neighbours do. I think you need to sit and look inside yourself and determine what you like to do, and find people who like to do that do and do it in safe ways.

As far as the people in Canada helping to move us forward in this way, I just love Come As You Are and Good For Her. In both cases Carlyle and then Jack and the team over at CAYA, they really are so vigilant about being aware of diversity in every conceivable fashion. And it’s all about being non-judgmental about sexuality. I think Dr. Trina Read is doing some great stuff. Also, a lot of the sex researchers who have come out of the University of Guelph are also doing incredible work. Cory Silverberg of course, an amazing Canadian who used to be part owner of CAYA and sex educator extraordinaire, who now writes for About.com.

Cory has an amazing ability to say things that are quite outlandish – like (and this is a direct quote from one of my shows) “It’s not all anal all the time” and make it sound like the weather (laughs) –  to the mainstream audience in a way that they are able to hear it. I’m also a huge fan of Jon Pressick and Sonya J Barnett.

Skye: Sex Matters has taken a break for the summer, so what’s in the works for you in the fall?

My newest role is as the new co-host of “InnerSpace”: a daily, national entertainment talk show that covers film, television, video games, technology, comic books, gadgets, and all things genre.  In this new role I’m bringing a female perspective to the topics and lately I’ve has been keeping busy doing a variety of fun things like thinking about gender and videogames, exploring sexy apps, interviewing saucy celebrities like Hugh Jackman and Ryan Gosling and generally asking people about their…um…inner spaces.

Skye: Any final thoughts for our readers?

CL: Spend a lot of time getting to know yourself and understanding your sexual needs. Because the more authentic you can be with yourself and your sexuality the more authentic you can be with your partner, and you’ll get more out of your relationships with people.

UK based ladies (or those willing to travel for a really good competition!) we have some exciting news for you!

~~~~

Ann Summers announces ITV2 team up as the lingerie giant begins the hunt for Britain’s sexiest face…

If you’re like most of us, then you probably won’t have had the chance to strut your stuff on the catwalks of this season’s prestigious London Fashion Week. But fear not, because Ann Summers and ITV2 have teamed up to give you the chance to be the face of Ann Summers for the spring/summer 2012 season and model lingerie from Ann Summers!

With lingerie at Ann Summers and the company itself having undergone some very significant rebranding in the past year-and-a-half, the British lingerie and sex toy giant has now partnered up with ITV2 to work on a tailor-made campaign and produce its first-ever TV advert. And not only this, but Ann Summers is inviting Britain’s bevy of beautiful women to join it in its quest for the sexiest face in the UK.

So what exactly is Ann Summers doing?

With the primary focus of Ann Summers’ campaign being the customer, it’s going to begin the campaign with a nationwide road show with ITV2 to hunt down some of the hottest honeys across the country, and will be visiting the UK’s most significant shopping centres between 22 September and 2 October, hitting Manchester’s Trafford Centre, Birmingham’s Bullring, Lakeside Essex, and Westfield Stratford City.

After a long and no doubt successful search across the country, Ann Summers will choose the most beautiful women it can find to train in the ways of model-like strutting and pouting – perhaps even showcasing sex toys from Ann Summers! These lucky ladies will then star in an advert which will be aired in the final episode of ITV2’s Bafta-award-winning The Only Way is Essex, after which viewers will vote for the beauty most deserving of a place as the face of the Ann Summers spring/summer 2012 campaign.

With 10-second teaser spots running exclusively across ITV2, the Great British public will be enticed to stay tuned in to watch the big finale.

How do you enter?

To be in with a chance of winning an appearance in Ann Summers’ TV advert, nationwide store window messaging and the company’s SS12 fashion campaign, entrants must supply full personal/contact details, up to three images and a video, 100 words about themselves, 100 words about why they should appear in Ann Summers’ TV campaign, and 100 words about what they think is sexy. And there are various ways you luscious girls can enter: either via the roadshows, www.sexyuncovered.com, facebook.com/AnnSummersOfficial, or the dedicated iPhone app, ‘Sexy On TV’.

Chief Executive of Ann Summers, Jacqueline Gold, said: “I am so excited about this campaign and working with ITV2. This is our first ever TV campaign and I am positive that our customers both old and new will be enticed in to store and online to see our fabulous new product as a result. Our customers are some of the most passionate on the high street and embody everything that Ann Summers stands for. I can’t wait to see them strut their stuff and show us all what sexy really is.”

ITV’s Group Commercial Sales Director, Simon Daglish, added: “We’re really excited about this partnership with Ann Summers which ultimately see them on TV for the very first time. It’s a great example of us being able to work with clients to really bring innovative and entertaining advertising to life which is the best way to drive response and engagement for our customers.”

~~~~

While this competition won’t reach our North American counterparts – and perhaps even some UK ladies aren’t looking to start their modelling career just yet – we here at Met Another Frog are genuinely excited about the fact a well known brand selling lingerie and sex toys is making a TV debut. It might not be a man-on-the-moon giant leap for mankind, but it’s one hell of a step forward.

But, before we say goodbye and close the door on Anything But Vanilla month I’d like to offer my heartfelt thanks to all the guest writers who chose to contribute their most titillating thoughts, steamiest stories and freakiest fantasies (which allowed Sam, Elizabeth and I to take a much needed break over the last month). Namely…

@rubyyyjones, @LovelyMissLily, @TrippAdvice, @MizzLoveLippz,  Simone B. (who so needs to get on the twitter, just sayin’), @theurbandater, @DirtyKnickers_, ‘Shawn’, @EvolvingEvie, @maxfab, @thenakedredhead, and last but definitely not least @SSDated

Here’s a sampling some of the hottest posts (IMO) featured in August, strictly for the benefit of anyone crazy enough to miss any of the fun last month…

Summer in the City: Part 2

Standard Operating Procedures Need Not Apply

An Unforgettable Birthday

No More Vanilla Sex

Fuck Me Til I’m Thesaurus

Now back to the month at hand. I’m sure you’re all wondering what we’ve got on tap for September, so I’m not going to keep you in suspense any longer. This month’s theme, the brainchild Met Another Frog’s own favourite former slutty private school girl, Elizabeth Rose, is…

Back to School.

That’s right boys and girls, school is in session and for the next few weeks we’re going to ‘teach’ you all there is to know about the birds and the bees, school girl/boy and naughty teacher fantasies, and much more.

Attention students! You are all expected to report right back here tomorrow at your bright eyed and bushy tailed best. Please note your attendance over the next few weeks is mandatory. Rest assured anyone who dares to cut class will be sent to the principal’s office for a sound paddling. And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?

SB

I walked Ricky outside, helped him into a cab and told him we’d catch up the next afternoon. Then I headed back inside. As I approached the bar Samantha was just ordering us another round of drinks. Vodka and cranberry for her, Appleton Estate V/X for me. I plopped down in the stool beside her. We sat silently for a few moments.

Her head was cocked ever so slightly, revealing a tattoo on her neck.

As the bartender placed our drinks before us the music suddenly changed.

“Oh my God, I LOVE this song” she exclaimed as Aretha Franklin’s voice filled the room.

“You have to dance with me,” she said, clasping my wrist, leading me to the small dance floor.

I put my hands on her waist.

“You’re a good dancer”, she said, “but you should probably hold me closer”

–

I could hear her brushing her teeth. This was my last chance. I could make up some excuse or feign illness. Or I could just tell her what was really on my mind. I knew I was about to cross a line I wasn’t sure I should cross. I knew I might regret this in the morning. I was just about to get up and leave when I looked up and saw her standing in the doorway.

“What you thinking about handsome?”

She looked even better now after she’d washed the night from her face and slipped into boy shorts and a tank top. Her nipples peeked through the fabric, suggesting I stay. Her wonderful chocolate skin did the same. She smiled at me then bit her lip. I could feel myself getting hard. I wanted to taste her flesh.

“Just thinking about how beautiful you look”

She flashed a devilish grin, walked toward me and straddled me.

“Oh. What’s this?” she said as she put her hand between our legs and rubbed my cock. “Looks like someone’s happy to see me”

Yes I was.

–

I knelt before her and put on the condom. She made space for me. I hovered above her, swept the hair from her face, caressed her cheek and asked her if she was sure she wanted to do this. She grabbed my ass and pulled me in.

–

My mouth was dry and cottony when I woke up in the morning. But I could still taste her too. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. Samantha smiled at me all bright eyed and bushy tailed. She clearly was a morning person. I was sober now and could see everything else clearly. She looked more stunning in the morning than she had the night before.

“Good morning handsome” she said. “Any regrets”

I paused for a moment. I thought about dinner the night before. The drinks at the bar. The dancing. The kissing.

“Nope”

“Good” she said before she kissed me. “Let’s do it again”

–

It was one of those cool ass evenings that just kind of comes together casually, organically. Someone was out having dinner with someone else when they decided to go to someplace else for drinks and ran into friends coming from somewhere else. Drinks flowed as easily as conversation between lifelong friends. Knowing laughter punctuated heated debates and shopworn arguments.

It was the kind of evening they write books about. The kind of evening that inspires movies.

I sat across from Patrick, one of my closest friends and Elaine, his wife of six years. Naomi, Paul and Ricky were to my left. Janine sat beside Patrick diagonally across the table from me. I excused myself to go the bathroom.

When I returned a vaguely familiar young lady was sitting in my chair.

Before I could fill in the blanks Patrick said, “Hey, you remember my little sister Samantha don’t you? She was in the neighbourhood and decided to join us for a drink.”

–

The Night Before…A celebration, of the many splendid things one night can bring happens on Friday, August 19^th, 2011, at PÄAEEZ Lounge (569 College Street, Toronto). Featuring DJ Kariz.

Dress code casual. No cover. Doors open @ 10pm

It’s a phrase that is so ripe, just oozing, with the possibility of things isn’t?

I mean, so much can happen – be it exhilarating or serene, whimsical or run of the mill, inspired or insipid, innocent fun or the down- and-oh-so-dirty variety – The Night Before…

.

The Night Before…the choice is

Mine.

Yours.

Ours.

To experience as much or as little of the possibility afforded to us in just one evening.

And to celebrate all that choice and possibility, Met Another Frog and her lil’ black book are throwing a party: The Night Before…

Dear Readers, consider this your personal invitation to join myself, Elizabeth (yes, she’ll be on this side of the pond), Sam and hl_bb at

The Night Before…

A celebration, of you our dear readers and the possibility of  (oh so many enticing) things the night – one night – can bring:

On Friday, August 19^th, 2011

At PÄAEEZ Lounge (569 College Street, Toronto, ON  M5A 1G6)

Featuring DJ Kariz

No cover. Doors open @ 10pm

So, come on out in your casual best to mingle, dance and to experience some very interesting possibilities The Night Before…

See you there,

SB

I like vanilla. This thought occurred to me while I was on a date at Toronto’s Waterfront Night Market. E, my date and clubhouse leader in the if-Sam-Sharpe-exchanges-his-bachelor-card-for-doting-husband-status-she’s-getting-the-call sweepstakes, is Chinese and wanted me to savour and experience a little taste of what an Asian Night Market has to offer. I ate more chicken skewers and Asian takes on pulled pork than necessary but I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Though I could do without fending off the relentlessly sour and putrid odour of stinky tofu.

Anyway. I stood before an ice cream vendor debating which bacon accented (yes, bacon) ice cream to order and actually thought to myself:

“Sometimes too much choice is worse than no choice. Whatever happened to just plain old vanilla?”

There are obvious parallels to dating and sex at work here. I mean, as I wandered through the night market it was often difficult to decide whose skewers to eat, or whose bao to sample so I ended up trying as many as I could. They were all delicious, many of them fancily presented, decked out as they were in the culinary equivalents of a three-piece suit. In the end, my favourite was one vendor’s simple pork in a bun. No muss no fuss.

So after carefully considering the virtues of one ice cream flavour over another I decided against having ice cream altogether. Why? Because at that very moment I desperately wanted some good old fashioned vanilla, and this particular vendor didn’t have it. How did I know vanilla was what I wanted? Well, after spending the evening being adventurous and trying everything under the sun I just wanted something plain and simple.

Like vanilla.

That’s the thing about ice cream. That’s the thing about food. That’s the thing about anything. The more you try, the more you know what you like. And you never know, after experimenting with breath play, wading into the BDSM pool or attending a Swingers’ party you might just figure out if you’d rather do vanilla than pralines and cream. (For an interesting and adult take on the virtues of what many consider to be “vanilla sex” read this.)

So, as an intro to our Anything But Vanilla month, I want to urge you all to open your minds and experiment a little with sex. Not because there’s anything wrong with being Vanilla, but because you might learn something new, fun and crazy that makes your particular brand of vanilla a little extra tasty. Like putting a chocolate sprinkle, cherry or double-headed dildo on top.

Appearance is everything. As much as we may want to stamp this out as a socially-limiting belief, it remains powerful. Sometimes appearance isn’t even a physical thing, sometimes it is just a thought about someone. Sex workers battle against appearances all of the time.

They are thought to be drug addicts.

They are thought to be lesser human beings.

Fortunately, Stepping Stone, a sex worker advocacy group out of Halifax is working hard with a new campaign to show that sex workers are far more than they appear.

With their new poster campaign, Stepping Stone is demonstrating that sex workers are people who are important to the people who love them. With slogans such as “I’m proud of my tramp, raising two kids on her own,” “At my wedding, my younger hooker gave the funniest speech,” and “I’m glad my prostitute made me finish school,” the Stepping Stone posters give back to sex workers something that was taken a long time ago: their humanity.

And they couldn’t come at a better time for that community, with one area man being charged with second degree murder in the death of a local sex worker, as well as attempted murder: and yet another man faces kidnapping charges involving a different sex worker. Would these incidents happen if we reconsidered the appearances of sex workers?

–

I have to admit, this article wasn’t exactly what I was thinking it would be when I first saw the title. I mean, not that I’ve ever heard or competitive pussy eaters or cock gobblers, but it made me think maybe there should be some sort of sexual Olympics. But I digress!

These competitive eaters appear to have pretty good insight when it comes to relationships. In an arena where one would think they might be overcome with excess of all sorts, these three share a bit about themselves and then dish out some sound advice. When Patrick “Deep Dish” Bertoletti is asked if a woman should be worried about her man’s porn collection, he doesn’t spoon-feed a standard response. “Porn’s like an electric toothbrush. I can brush my teeth manually and take some time, or I can use an electric supersonic toothbrush and be done really efficiently. Masturbating is a daily routine for most guys, and porn makes it easier. But you don’t necessarily want to take something you’d watch and do it in your own bedroom.”

Let’s hope they all use good electric toothbrushes before they go fuckin’ after feastin’.

–

Well, Fredericton just became a much less fun place.

The capital city of New Brunswick is losing its only strip club.

How can the capital city of anywhere NOT have a strip club?

Using typical arguments of it being a “non-conforming” property and that it is in the “best interests of the city,” Mayor Brad Woodside announced that the city bought out the business for $500 000. Two councilors voted against the deal, citing that was too much to pay for the watering hole. I guess they weren’t aware that you always pay way too much for drinks at strip clubs.

Jokes aside, this is a blow to the sex community of a smaller city. Strip clubs, while they do sometimes have issues and problems, are a place of fantasy for their patrons. Not to mention, this particular hot spot was, apparently a thriving business that employed nearly 20 people who are now out of work. And the city doesn’t have long term plan for the property.

Proof that it isn’t just the Bay of Fundy that flows backwards.

Looking to a romantic comedy for significant relationship guidance is probably asking for trouble. As in he will get caught doing something stupid, she will say something unknowing insensitive, some smart-alecky kid will turn out to be a wise sage and after some kind of chase involving horses/dogs/police/terrorists/exes (are those last two interchangeable?) the happy couple will emerge for a grand kiss and the smart-alecky kid will be in their wedding. These sort of situations don’t so much happen in real life.

–

That makes this article about the conversations in the rom-com classic When Harry Met Sally all the more interesting. It tackles the myth that male sexual desire is too strong to stay within the constraints of friendship with a woman. He’ll always want to get into her.

Talk about selling us short! Like the writer, I too have known for a long time that I am bisexual and I’ve had some wicked lusty thoughts about a good number of my friends. I too learned that I had to temper that if I didn’t want to become a hermit. This may have been a personal choice, but it is one that I think could apply to society as a whole. We need to stop considering sex to be “It.” Odd statement from a sex journalist, I’m sure, but I’m not saying we should not think about, fantasize about, study or desire sex. We need to go against our all-encompassing desires and take a more chill approach to sex. Sex is good. It happens. I like when it happens. When it doesn’t happen, that’s okay too.

So, if you’ve got the hots for your friend, revel in it. Enjoy it. Soil a few tissues with it. And then call her up and go for coffee and a laugh.