• Decent vibrations
• Gets hot
• Issues with light indicator
Intensity Level: 4/5 Noise Level: 2/5
Like most girls, I’m a girl who is obsessed with clit vibes. I feel like you can never have too many, and I’m always looking for the best one out there. Or at least something that’s better than what I already consider to be the best clit vibe out there. When I first saw the Envy line, I was super excited to see they had a small version. It wasn’t as small as I was expecting it to be, and I actually would have preferred something a bit smaller. I’ve never owned a Jopen product before, so I had high hopes for this One. I’m always reading great things about their power and silicone material, and with such a high price tag, I would expect nothing less than great.
The entire Envy line by Jopen is made of silicone; an odorless, non-porous, and hypoallergenic material. If your toy has a faint smell to it upon arrival, it’s due to the packaging it comes in. Mine had a very faint smell to it but it went away completely once I washed it. The silicone material is smooth but it’s not buttery smooth like some of my other silicone toys (that I love). This silicone has a small drag to it, enough so that I like to add a small amount of water-based lubricant. Make sure that you only use this toy with a water-based lubricant, or a high quality silicone lubricant that you know won’t react to the material. I strongly suggest spot testing. There is also a seam along the sides of the toy but they can’t be felt or noticed during use, so it’s no big deal. It does have the tendency to collect lint, but I’ve had toys that are way worse, so this one isn’t so bad.
The Envy One comes with a USB charger. You can either charge it on your computer or you can use a USB charging adapter that plugs in the wall. The charging port is located at the bottom of the toy, and it has the same kind of plug as a pair of headphones/ear buds, so it’s very easy to figure out.
The Envy One takes 2.5 hours to come to a complete charge. With a complete charge, you’re supposed to get 4.5 hours of play time on low speed, and 2 hours of play time on high speed. I can say that the batter did last two hours on the highest setting, but I did notice it start to weaken as time went by.
My charging process did not go very smooth. When I plugged-in the Envy One, a red light came on but when I looked over at it about 5 minutes later, the toy was not lit up all. I unplugged it and then plugged it back in and the light came back on again. Again, I looked over at it and the light turned off but I just let sit on the charger for a couple hours anyway. After a couple of hours passed, my toy had appeared to be fully charged. I was pretty annoyed by the light issue. It had me wondering if it was even charging, and also unsure of when it was done charging.
The Envy One is a small sized vibrator with a tapered tip that is good for delivering pin-pointed vibrations. Even though it’s a small vibrator, I still think it’s a bit on the bulky side. I personally wish it was a tad slimmer and shorter. It resembles the very popular We-Vibe Salsa, except the Envy is longer, wider, and covered in silicone.
The Envy One measures in at 4.5 inches long and 1.25 inches in diameter. It’s big enough that you could use it as a teaser to tease the vaginal opening, and also for some shallow insertion but the size is best for clitoral and external stimulation.
The Envy One comes programmed with 7 functions, and you adjust the speeds in increments from low to high. There are two buttons on the bottom of the toy that controls everything. One of the buttons has the letter F on it. That button scrolls through the 7 different vibration patterns. The other button powers the toy on and off and increases the vibration intensity. It only takes one press of the blank button to turn the toy off, so it’s very easy to accidentally turn it off during use. On the plus side, when you turn it back on it takes you right back to where you left off. Honestly, it took me a little bit to figure out how to work this thing. It can be a little tricky at first.
The vibrations on this toy are strong, but they don’t really travel that well through the silicone. I would say that the silicone lowers the actual potential that this toy has. The vibrations are the strongest and most rumbly right after charging it. They weaken pretty quickly, and they also weaken when applying pressure. I’m someone who applies a lot of pressure, so that was definitely an issue for me.
The vibrations can be felt through the entire toy but they’re strongest at the tip. After about 20 minutes the vibrations did start to become slightly finger numbing. Again, I think that could have something to do with the way the silicone distributes the vibrations. I was very impressed with the noise level. You can hear a slight rattle when it’s on but I doubt anybody in a separate room would hear it.
Keeping It Safe / Packaging:
The Envy One comes packaged in a really nice box that is perfect for storing your toy inside of, but I was really surprised that a storage pouch wasn’t included. Even if the box is good for storing your toy at home, it’s nice to have a pouch for it in case you want to travel with it. The Envy One is definitely travel friendly, so I would recommend finding a pouch to store it in if you take it traveling with you. The packaging comes with some information on the back, and there is also a small pamphlet included inside the box.
Keeping It Clean:
The Envy One is 100% waterproof and very easy to clean. You’re not able to boil it or run it through the dishwasher, so you have to wash it in warm water with a mild soap or a toy cleaner of your choice.
Like I said before, I had high hopes for my Envy One. Unfortunately it wasn’t all I was expecting it to be. The first problem I had was the charging issue. Even though the toy seems to charge perfectly fine, the light indicator is all kinds of jacked-up. My second issue was how hot it started to get while I was using it. About 15-20 minutes into my playtime, I could feel the heat from the toy warming up my vagina. It doesn’t burn you or anything, but it is very noticeable and can start to feel uncomfortable. I honestly wouldn’t spend the $100 range asking price that these things are going for. My Salsa and my Tango are cheaper than that, and I like those way better.
If you’re interested in purchasing the Envy One by Jopen, you can find it on the LoveHoney Website.
For the month of October, I will be giving away a Tantus Vamp! I’m also including two sample packs of YES lubricant (1 water-based and 1 oil-based). There are several ways to enter, and you can read all of the rules below. I’ve also provided a picture of the exact products that will be shipped to the winner.
a Rafflecopter giveaway
This giveaway will kick-off on October 1, 2013 and will come to an end on October 31, 2013 at midnight. I will be responsible for shipping, so I can only afford to cover shipping in the US at this time. You must be 18+ to enter. Once a winner has been selected by Raffelcopter, I will e-mail the winner and give them 48 hours to provide me with their complete mailing address. Thank you so much for participating in my giveaway! Good luck!
In honor of the start of Football Season, I painted my nails my team colors; Orange & Navy.
On top of the base coat, I added one coat of Navy Shatter by OPI. It’s been a while since I’ve used a crackle nail polish, and the only reason I even bought this color was specifically for Football Season. OPI Crackle is not my favorite polish to work with. It’s very thick and it eventually starts to clump. As far as clumping goes, I’ve had better luck with my Navy Shatter than I have my Black Shatter. You only apply one coat of the crackle polishes, so you have to try to do it quickly and in as least strokes as possible. As you can see, the Navy Shatter is very dark and almost looks black. I wish it were a bit more subtle.
The base coat I’m using is called “Y’all Come Back Ya Hear?”, also by OPI. In the bottle it looked like the perfect orange color for doing my team colors. When I applied the polish, it was a completely different story. This orange colors is very transparent. You have to do at least 3 coats just to get the orange color to show up. I would have liked to do one more coat, but since I was adding a coat of Crackle and a clear top to top it off, I decided to just to the three coats of orange.
• Unique sensation
• Requires a lot of lube
• Not waterproof
Intensity Level: 2.5/5 Noise Level: 4/5
I first saw the Sqweel a long time ago when I first started browsing online for sex toys. I never did get the original Sqweel, so when I saw that they released a new and improved version I decided I would give it a shot. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the Sqweel, it’s a non-vibrating sex toy that is supposed to simulate oral sex. Instead of vibrations, this oral sex simulator has a wheel of ten silicone tongues that spin a lot like a Ferris Wheel. The Sqweel 2 is definitely something completely different than any other sex toy I have ever used. While this toy may be the closest thing I’ve had to oral sex, don’t get it twisted. This is not a real tongue, therefore it is not going to feel like the real thing. If you go into using this toy expecting it to feel just like oral sex, you’re going to be extremely upset. I didn’t fall in love with this toy, and there are a lot of things I would change. Whether or not you still want to give it a try will be completely up to you. I am glad that I gave it a try, though. If they improved some things to make this toy more pleasurable, I would most likely give it another try.
The body of the Sqweel 2 is plastic, but the part of the toy that makes the most contact with your private parts is made of a body-safe silicone. Silicone is free of phthalates, hypoallergenic, and completely non-porous. Since the silicone and the plastic are both free of phthalates, it’s pretty much an odorless toy. The plastic has that “new” smell to it but it’s gone with one good rinse.
The silicone tongues feels very durable. They are smooth on the surface and pliable. You can basically flex them all the way down in both directions. I’m not very fond of the firmness of the tongues. I didn’t think the tongues were soft enough. In my opinion, they needed to feel a lot softer and more “skin-like” if it wants to feel anywhere near a real tongue.
There’s no texture to the silicone. It’s smooth to the touch, with no drag. I’m surprised there isn’t any kind of taste-bud effect to the tongues to make it more realistic.
Even though the material is very smooth with no drag to it, the silicone tongues are not very gentle so you still have to use a shit-load of lubricant. I stay on the safe side and only use water-based lubricants. I don’t want to take any chances at ruining the silicone.
Design, Shape, & Size:
It’s pretty clear the The Sqweel 2 is not your average looking sex toy. It pretty much sums up the term of a novelty toy, at least in my opinion. You may have noticed it’s not be the most attractive toy out there but it does look very interesting. The design of this toy is probably the reason why a lot of people want to give this toy a try, no matter what your experience level may be. I can’t say that I love the design, but I really don’t see any other way they could have really designed this toy.
It’s a very bulky product, and it’s not the most comfortable toy to hold in your hand while using it by yourself. I wouldn’t say it’s all that easy to hide, and I’m not sure I would even consider taking it with me when I travel. The plastic cap helps protect the wheel and keep out any dust.
Functions & Controls:
The Sqweel 2 can be a little tricky at first, and may take some getting used to. First things first. To get those tongues spinning, you’ll need 3 AAA batteries. The battery compartment is located on the back, it’s very simple to open and close and the batteries are easy to insert
The next thing you want to do is make sure that your Sqweel 2 is locked, that way your toy doesn’t come apart while you’re in the middle of using it. Once you’ve done those two things, your Sqweel 2 is ready to use.
There are two buttons on the front of the Sqweel 2 that control the speed and direction of the “wheel of tongues”. There’s a play button and a button with arrows.
The play button controls the speed of the tongues. There are three speeds, each one faster than the one before. There isn’t all much of a difference between the three speeds. I honestly felt like they should have offered a much slower speed. I thought they were too fast, causing it to feel more like a smacking sensation.
The button with the arrows on it control the direction that the wheel spins. The Sqweel 2 offers three different direction modes. It spins clockwise, counter clockwise, and then it goes back and forth between the two, simulating a licking motion.
If you ever start to feel the need to apply pressure with the Sqweel you’re basically out of luck. I wanted to apply pressure when I was using this, but it would almost completely stop moving. Once you’re ready to turn the Sqweel off, simply hold the plus sign button for 3-5 seconds and it will shut off. It doesn’t have any kind of memory, so once you turn it off it will not remember where it was when you turn it back on. Whenever you use the Sqweel, make sure that noise discretion is not an issue. No matter what speed or direction, the Sqweel is a pretty loud toy.
Keeping it clean:
The Sqweel 2 requires a few extra steps that your typical sex toys do not. First of all, it’s not waterproof, so when you clean the plastic body of the toy make sure that you don’t get any water near the battery compartment. I recommend thoroughly cleaning the plastic base with toy wipes. To clean the silicone tongues, you will first need to slide the switch on the front of the toy to ‘unlock’ symbol to remove the cover. Then you can easily take out the wheel of tongues and wash them with warm water and soap, or your choice of toy cleaner. After cleaning your toy, make sure to dry it off completely before storing it. When you’re all done using your Sqweel 2, make sure to remove the batteries to ensure a long life for your new toy.
The Sqweel 2 comes simply packaged in a cardboard/clamshell packaging. You can see the toy through the packaging, and on the front of the package it says ‘ORAL SEX TOY’ in big letters. With that being said, it’s not at all discreet and not ideal for storage. It also comes with a small instructions pamphlet that comes in 8 different languages, and it also tells you how to use and clean the toy.
I’m not sure I would really describe this toy to be all that gentle. For me, it was very uncomfortable if I didn’t use enough lube. You really have to use a lot of lubricant to get that slick sensation or else it will just feel like your clitoris is being smacked. It wasn’t exactly a painful experience, but if you don’t lube it up really good with a slick water-based lubricant it could be very painful. I always apply pressure with vibrators, but since this isn’t a vibrator, you really have to take your time and let the tongues gently lap your clit. It’s best to slowly build yourself up to an orgasm. I’m a little sensitive downstairs, so other users might actually enjoy the smacking sensation that I wasn’t very fond of. It’s also enjoyable to use around the anal area. I was actually surprised at how much I enjoyed it.
I plan to try some of the different wheels in the future in hopes that I find one that I like better than this one.
The Men of TMI Tuesday
1. Advizor: http://advizortoall.blogspot.com
I once overheard in a bathroom, “There is nothing as over-rated as sex or under-rated as a good bowel movement.” Discuss.
-Ummm… I’m quite certain I’d go with sex over a good shit any day. Besides… girls don’t go number two.
2. the late phoenix: http://thelatephoenix.blogspot.com/
Friendship lasts longer than cumming. which of your online friends that you’ve never met would you like to meet in real life? which do you think you could become life-long REAL friends with? Actual friends, like going out to coffee and movies with, gossiping with, kissing on the forehead, hugging, loving.
-Hmm..I would have to go with The Sin Doll. She just seems like such a down-to-earth, stand-up kind of broad that I could see myself kickin’ it with. I also wouldn’t mind spending a day with @theashrussell— I follow her on Twitter and her tweets crack me up. You should probably go follow her, because I said so!
3. John D Stories
In a parallel universe, who out of your blog or Twitter followers would you most like to spend a steamy evening with? What would you do? Why them?
– Do fictional characters count? Eric Northman from True Blood follows me on Twitter, and I’d love to for real fuck him instead of eye fuck him on T.V.
4. Virtual Sin:
a. What method of stimulation (intercourse, oral, manual, toy, whatever) gives you the strongest orgasm?
b. With what method of stimulation do you get the most orgasms?
c. If the answer to a is different from the answer to b, what’s wrong with your life?
b. I have a clitoral orgasm the most, courtesy of either my Tango or Salsa.
c. Everyone has something wrong with their life, no?
5. Jon Pressick: http://sex-in-words.blogspot.com
Would you rather have a life where you only had sex once a year for 2 minutes or where you have to have sex, every day for a minimum of 2 hours?
– Hands down, every day for a minimum or 2 hours.
Is there anyone on your partner’s side of the family you find hot? If you could hook up with them without anyone finding out (ever!) would you?
– Negative. I am currently living the single life.
There’s a new shop on the block and I wanted to take a moment to tell you about them. Toy Box Under The Bed is a lesbian owned company that is based out of Houston, TX. They have some unbeatable prices, and a variety of products to choose from! Check them out and be sure to subscribe to the newsletter to get updates on upcoming deals and promotions.
They have some great sales going on right now! You can get 15% off of all of their Kinky products, which they have a large selection to choose from! You can also use the checkout code “SUNKISSED” for 10% off of all other items.